Happy Friday, pretties! We had to do some back-end testing this morning for some, ehhem, *things* we’ll be bringing to you next week or thereabouts, so here’s a pretty little post comin’ atcha faces, afternoon-style.
What we shall address today… Issue #1: Bridal Plasty. Issue #2: Card and Vendor Love Photography Giveaways. Issue #3: Miscellaneous.
But first, a miniature glittery Christmas Village I found on A Field Journal.
… I obsess over A Field Journal. And it’s healthy to have obsessions. That’s my personal opinion. Especially when they bring you things like this:
Ok, for real now. Let’s get down to brass tacks.
(lol. Sorry. That gorgeous feather ring above is made of brass and I just said “brass tacks” so I had to share it here. The timing was too perfect to pass up. Ok, MOVING RIGHT ALONG…)
Issue #1: as promised, E!’s Bridal Plasty.
This was unpleasant.
Let me start off by saying that none of these women need plastic surgery. I was hoping that at least *some* of them would have deformities from birth, and that the show would be affording them the opportunity to improve their lives in ways they couldn’t afford themselves.
… But no.
I waded through the torturous chamber of suffocating self-hate that is that show last night. And I have to say, I resent you guys for making me do that. I approached it with all the positivity in the world, as I had just eaten some pizza, and pizza makes me very happy and ready for anything. So I nestled into my wraparound couch, positioned my laptop on the top of my lap, and proceeded to multitask (there was no way I was going to donate my full attention to this newest legitimate reason to hate America).
Now… I knew it would be ridiculous – most bridal reality shows are – but nothing… nothing… prepared me for THAT KIND OF RIDICULOUS. Cases in point:
The first competition involved grabbing syringes and the reward was admission to a syringes in the face party. The last thing these girls needed was injections. Aren’t they trying to lose weight? And aren’t they all extremely young and *not* in need of age-defiance procedures?
One girl who had already been apart from her fiance for untold months while he was away fighting in Iraq, opted to be on the show instead of being there to greet her beloved at the airport upon his RETURN FROM WAR. She left a note on the dry-erase board in their family room. I don’t remember exactly what it said so here I’ll tell you what it might as well have said:
“Sorry babe- had to go tape a show where I’ll be competing for lipo. Oops! Totally sux that it’s at the same time you get back from war. MY BAD! Oh well – hope war went well! Oohh and there’s cold pizza on the table from the weekend. Ok, off to get famous and cut up my body so you’ll love me more!”
Dry-erase boards are for grocery lists. They are *not* for welcome home from war messages.
Another young lady considered being on the show “a good deed,” and this was her way of feeling good about being away from her fiance for four months. Let me repeat that, more clearly: she was lamenting the need to separate from her fiance for four months to tape the show, but considered it a good deed, so it was worth it. She also cries a lot, so I was over her early.
Ok, forget that this show is a soulcrushing reminder of America’s widespread dissatisfaction with the self.
Forget that there’s something very, very wrong about competing for plastic surgery.
Forget that these girls are emotional basketcases and do not – by any stretch of the imagination – fit the criteria for a good plastic surgery patient.
Forget that they get major procedures done in between competitions – which makes absolutely no sense to me.
Forget everything that’s wrong with this show. … And there’s a lot so I’ll give you a minute to forget all of it… ok… done? Ok, read on…
Here’s what weirds me out the most:
The “winner” of the show will “unveil herself to her groom ON THE DAY OF THEIR WEDDING.”
I have so many things to say about this, that they come all the way around to having nothing to say about this. If that makes sense. I need to wrap this up, I think I’m going to die a little death if I have to keep assessing this show. It’s making me dumber. (Dummer? … S***!!! <– See, I’m getting dumber! … or is it “more dumb?” ABORT. ABORT.)
Issue #2: Giveaways!
I assume you’ve entered our current giveaway… correct?
Well, when that baby’s over, we’ve got many more coming. Next week, the first of our amazeballs photography giveaways begins, and you better buy some diapers because these packages are going to make you crap your pants. No seriously, you’re gonna love love looove these giveaways. Here’s why they’re awesome: you get free photography. That one’s obvious. But here’s how we *know* you’re going to love them: because the giveaways are being offered by a few of our most favoritest photographers…
… Also known as members of Vendor Love, The Knotty Bride’s Preferred Vendor Guide! That’s right – in celebration of the guide going live *quite* soon, we’re doing a series of killer giveaways, and we couldn’t be more excited to bring all of this to your deserving faces. We heart our vendors, and you’re about to seriously heart them, too. :)
Issue #3: Miscellaneous Time!
Ok, just gotta show you one more brass ring from Old Gold Boutique. You know, for old time’s sake:
Oh, and I love this Lace Decorative Sticky Tape from Cox & Cox, for your wrappin’ needs.
And, finally, this, via the world of tumblr, which I’ve been saving within a folder on my home away from home, Pinterest…
Wait, one more thing – is it weird that I want this gift wrapping suitcase for a Christmas gift? That’s sort of ironic, right? In an Alanis Morrissette kind of way, I mean.
Ok, that about wraps it up for now. (Tee hee.) Have a positively wonderful weekend, friendlies. See you back here on Monday! Oh and get your thinking caps on, cause next week is another giveaway, and we’re looking to make it interesting. (Ohhh what could she mean?)
Peace and love!