Ok, so today’s wedding is so perfectly pretty and perfect that I threw up a little bit in my mouth IN A GOOD WAY. It’s the wedding manifestation of a perfectly cooked delicious and ultimately belch-worthy meal in one of those European countries that consider belching a compliment (so I can only imagine throwing up a little bit in the mouth is surely the highest praise.) — What’s that? Belching isn’t a compliment anywhere and we’ve – well, actually, maybe just I’ve – been fooled this whole time into thinking it is? Oh. Oh I see. Ok.
Moving swiftly along… and before I get into the weddingy part of this Real Wedding post…
Today, my darlings, is B-Day, or as we’ve been calling it on le Twitter, #BALLCHOP2011. Yes, the day is here.
Now, granted, the decision to share the following conversation on the blog this afternoon comes immediately following a period of approximately three hours during which a shittae instrumental elevator music rendition of Justin Timberlake’s “Cry Me a River” had been playing on a loop, thanks to a photog’s site I’d opened up while the laptop was on mute and forgotten about long enough to not be able to track it down amidst the tens of thousands of tabs I currently have open within this browser, you see. So, that being said…
Here’s a pretty-much-verbatim conversation I had just this morning with honey when he called to say hi:
ME: I’ve been thinking a bit this morning about Bambi. I wonder if he’s had his balls chopped off yet. Or if they’re still attached to his body. Do you know the surgery time?
HIM: Hmm, no actually I don’t. Hey, maybe they’re sitting on a little metal table just out of reach and he just woke up and sees his balls for the first time since going under, and he’s trying to reach out and lick them.
ME: Ohhh poor baby! He’s probably wishing he had been given just one more chance to lick them. Like a “I-know-what’s-about-to-go-down-and-while-I-do-not-agree-with-it-in-the-LEAST-I’m-glad-you-at-least-tipped-me-off-so-that-I-may-enjoy-this-final-lick.” Like cigarette addicts. Honey, he never got to lick them that one last time KNOWING he was about to lose them indefinitely. That’s so sad.
… Uggh. I’m just imagining they have him on his back, arms awkwardly jointed and restrained, legs awkwardly jointed and restrained, them with surgical masks on, and him just laying there, immobile.
HIM: I don’t think they have his arms splayed out like in an S&M video.
ME: What do you think?
HIM: You know the position he sleeps in? They probably have him on his side.
ME: Oh right! Yeah that makes sense. And they’re probably just holding his leg up… or what if they have his one leg in a sling? (*HAHAHAAHHAH* but also *tears*)
HIM: RIGHT… so this was fun. Ok, I hope you have a wonderful day, honey!
Poor thing. Never saw it coming.
Also we were laughing throughout the entire conversation. Does that make us evil??
And another thing: those two pictures above were taken with my brand new iphone 4. And they say they improved the camera? I say CRAP.
… AGAIN, MOVING. RIGHT. ALONG…
Truly, the ONLY thing that could possibly get my furbaby’s surgical situation off of my mind today is a FULL TILT AMAZEBALLS WEDDING, but on the simpler side. Also known as my ideal type of wedding scenario. So it’s a good photographer Andy Wakeman brought this stunner into my life last week, because it is seriously filling the void in my soul like nothing else could. Also, THE BRIDE FOUND HER GORGEOUS DRESS ON E-BAY. Say WHAT?? I KNOW. I’d say a round of applause is in order for that, ladies and gentlemen.
Here’s the rundown on her big day from our beautiful bride, Meghan:
We wanted an “Up North Experience”, encompassing a laid-back, vintage feel, using natural elements that remind us of vacation. Thus, we hosted the ceremony and reception in a cherry orchard, with Lakes Leelanau and Michigan as our back-drop. We served Walleye, Pork Loin with dried cherry chutney, asparagus, and redskin potatoes- all up north foods. We also offered Northern MI wines, Hard Cider from Tandem Cider (Suttons Bay) and Shorts Brewery Beer. The rehearsal dinner included a wine tasting at Leelanau Cellars.At the cocktail hour we had the Bluegrass Band “Sourmash” play, and the reception was kept alive by “MacDaddy”. I’m biased, but it was the most fun I’ve ever had at a wedding!
Awwww… I suspect a little eskimo kissing going on there, eh? EH? Methinks. MAXIMUM ADORABLENESS.
Ok, SO… I have a few questions. And you can a) respond to all of them, b) respond to one or two of them, c) completely ignore them and speak my own mind THANK YOU VERY MUCH, or d) screw your questions, Alison. And your little dog, too.
Ok, FIRST thing: Should I keep my conversations between me and my honey to myself from here on out?
SECOND thing: We have to wait all the way until TOMORROW to get Bambino back. AAAAAAHHHHHHH. It is torture, my lovelies. How do I cope. Howwwwww.
THIRD and most important thing: What did you think of Meghan and Aaron’s wedding? Personally, I’m heavily digging their super simple, super delicate, but at the same time perfectly colorful florals, their decision to have pie at their wedding (a personal choice of mine) and their eskimo kisses on the dance floor. But that’s me. Are you digging the same things? Different things? Stop asking you what you’re digging? Oh ok – sure, ok I’m sorry. My bad.
xoxo! – Alison
Photography: Andy Wakeman Photography / Ceremony Location: Private Orchard, Lake Leelanau, MI / Reception Location: Same / Dress Designer: Cassablanca / Dress Shop: E-bay! / Hair Stylist: Salon Verve / Make Up: done herself / Invitation: designed by Aaron (the groom!) / Rings: Miner’s North, Traverse City / Flowers: Groom’s Mother, Esther Perrault / Cake: Pie- Traverse City Pie Company (4 types) / Catering: Catering by Kelly