Happy Tuesday afterneeeevening, peeps!  By the way, is it “drink stirs” or “drink stirrers?”  Anyway, good news: one of our lovely DIY contributors Andrea of Gray Harper Event Maker is back today with something we’ve been craving; a super adorbs, SUPER EFFING EASY AS CAKE, DIY project for your wedding or engagement party or baby shower or whatever event at which you plan to hand people drinks and want them to look like more than just *drinks*.  That’s what makes a party a PAR-TAY, as we all know.  And I’m extra bits of excited, because even iiiiiii can do this one on the first try.  Which is important to me since I HATE practicing.

For the extra pizazz part of this project, you’ll want to get a hold of some pennant stickers.  Andrea used those adorable kraft brown pennant stickers from Olive Manna that you’ll see featured in this post.  Of course, there are lots of options out there as far as stickers go!  So feel free to get creative.  For example, these bunting stickers and pennant stickers below from Little Ink are some faves of mine.  But if you wanna try this out immediately and don’t have no stinkin’ time for shipping, you can experiment with Avery brand mailing labels from the office!  (Note: TKB does not condone stealing from the office supply closet.  Ehhem.  What you do on your own time is your call. :)

Ok, TO THE DIY WE GO!  Take it away, Andrea!

Andrea here!  So, you wanna add a little tactile fun to your drinks with these cute and easy toppers?!  Great!

Here’s what you’ll need:

1. bamboo sticks
2. felt craft balls
3. Cotton thread
4. Pennant Stickers (like Alison said, we got ours from Olive Manna but any will do)
5. Scissors
6. Glue Gun + sticks (obvi’s!)

DIRECTIONS:

1. Heat that glue gun up and dab a dot of glue on the flat end of a bamboo stick.

2. Attach a felt ball to it, hold it there for a few seconds to let the glue dry and set.

3. Take a pre-cut piece of the cotton thread (about 10in long), and tie it to the base of the stick and the ball.

4. Begin wrapping the thread around the ball, overlapping and crossing the thread over itself.

5. Tie off the thread at the base of the ball again, and cut any excess.

6. Wrap the sticker around the stick, and don’t forget to write a message first!

Alison again!  I don’t wanna let my puppeh lovers down… here’s another installment of:

“A Day in the Life of Bambino McPuppypants”

… if you think I’m weird, you’re a smart one.

Aright so let’s talk.  Here are some topics that intrigue me, for a little chit chat in the comments:

1) Do you like the idea of adding some cute to your drinks?

2) What do you think of Andrea’s DIY drink stirs, you guys?  Something a little bit different from your typical stirrer is always a fun jaunt, doncha think?!

3) What are your wedding colors?  And what color string do you think would look best on these babies?

xoxo!  - Alison

Gray Harper Event Maker is member of TKB’s Vendor Love. You can explore more of Gray Harper Event Maker in our guide!

{all images by Izzy Hudgins Photography}

Hey lovers.  Happy Monday afternoon.  I hope you all had lovely/relatively enjoyable/tolerable weekends over the holiday, puppy and kitty parents included!  Anybody get married this weekend?  I brought Bambino to visit his grandma (and by association, grandpa) in the country, and I don’t know which one of them enjoyed it more:  

They’re sweet together.  It’s actually cuter than even those pictures show, if that’s even possible.  They’re like old college friends; they just *get* one another and can spend hours reliving the good times.  And you know what?  I live to carry Bambino wike uh whittle newborn behbehkins, the way he lets my Mom.  But, instead of loving it like in my dreams for him, he reacts by rigor-mortising his entire body as if to say, “please believe that I am several hours dead and just leave me alone right side up, I beg of you, smothering woman.”  It’s a HUGE bummer.  But I digress… especially since we’ve got SSBs to discuss.  Oh, are you familiar with SSBs?  Well, whether or not you are, I’m extremely excited to let you know that Cassie’s come back to TKB today to share yet another highly embarrassing story about life as a couple once you’ve moved in together.  And once you’ve enjoyed laughing at hers, I encourage you to share your own Secret Single Behaviors in the comments… because you all KNOW you have at least ONE.  Don’t act all coy like you’re a real live Betty Draper except without all that jealousy that comes out in her therapy sessions.  (NOTE: I am up to Episode 2 in Season 2 of Mad Men, so I’m still on the blonde wife Draper.  PLEASE, no spoilers beyond the spoiler I gave myself when I turned on a recent episode by accident to find he has a new wife!  Thanks in advance.)  

But yeah, I wanna hear your secret behaviors, not only because it’s amazing how cleansing it is to tell the world, but also because I like juicy details.  And I delight in taking a break from spilling the weirdo beans in my life and reading about some of yours.  :)  ’Course, if you’re shy, you can always just dish on your friend’s secret habits.  This is the internet – she’ll never find out.  ;)

Take it away, Cassie!

When Moving In Together Makes You Realize You Are Weird

Now that I’m living with the love of my life, I’m beginning to realize that I’m a little…weird.

You see, I have this thing I do…  I’m just going to say it.

I have a secret single behavior.  I have SSB…  You’ve probably already heard this term used before, from Sex and the City…but we need to discuss.  (Also, my inner dialogue sounds strikingly similar to Carrie Bradshaw…so naturally when I write about living with someone, the episode that she moves in with Aiden is FRONT and CENTER).

Okay… I’m not just talking about the kind of SSB that resembles not shaving your legs because it’s winter…or only shaving the bottom half of your legs when you’re in a rush and just need to look cute in the dress.  And I’m not just talking about popping zits in a mirror, and spending hours looking at your pores in the mirror.  And it’s not just about eating teddy grahams and frosting as a midnight snack.

What I’m talking about TRANSCENDS the usual, and gets to the real nitty gritty.  The kind of nitty gritty that just feels SO GOOD when you do it, and you never really realized it was a problem before until you moved in with a man.

You see…

I pick at my nail polish.  Nail polish was NOT invented for me because my nails are neither long nor strong, because they do not like to hold polish well,  because the second they get any longer than my finger they simply MUST be cut, and because I get too bored with a color or the polish just ends up chipping and fading anyway.  Ugh.  I have since switched to getting shellac manicures, in the hopes that this no-chip polish will fight off the urge to pick…but it just makes it THAT much stronger.  Because they told me it would be impossible to chip off.  So I have to try.  You see my problem here…

There’s nothing I can do to hide the fact that I pick at my nail polish.  I’ll be sitting on the couch with Timmy, or we’ll be lying in bed, and I HAVE to do it…because it’s something I’ve ALWAYS done.  I will pick my polish off until there is a pile of it on my coffee table…at which point I’ll dust into my hand and throw away.  And Timmy completely and utterly…HATES it.  He always scolds me for picking, he always asks me to stop, and if that doesn’t work he’ll just de-snuggle from me in the hopes that will make me stop.

Want to know something embarrassing?  We were snuggling in bed one time, and I picked my nail polish off and it landed right in his EYE!!!  In his EYE!!!  How awful is that???!  I can’t even stop for five seconds mid-snuggle to keep my nails in check…and heaven forbid I actually use nail polish remover before this ever becomes a problem!

In.  His.  Eye.

Back to the point…so…what do you DO when moving in with a man greatly throws you off your game, and you can no longer CONTINUE with your secret behavior?  What do you do when they find out?

Your single self has been put in the closet, after years of stripping down to your bra in your living room because no one was there to say you couldn’t…after years of leaving clothes in the dryer as a mini dresser because you knew at least where your whites were…after many many many trips to the grocery store with a solo basket and talking to yourself about your pantry inventory while you peruse the shelf…after many cereal suppers because you just didn’t feel the need to cook…  Your little mini-rituals that you perform throughout the day have now been taken out of their safeguard and are considered crazy…

Now, take a look at your secret single behavior (because I know you have at least ONE), and write it down.  It’s actually not that WEIRD when you look at it…and it’s not even that weird when you say it out loud.  They’re not necessarily a FREAKY thing (well…maybe some of you), but that’s not the reason why they’re secret.  It is only when the addition of another person into your extremely personal bubble is invaded that your secret single behavior is compromised.

Sometimes don’t you just miss all that FREEDOM to eat, dress (or undress), bathe and sleep how you wanted without having to answer to another soul about what in the heck you were doing?

What are your secret single behaviors?  And for those who are already married, do you proudly display your SSB if you have one?  Or have you managed to still keep it, well…secret?

Let’s talk.

xoxo,

Cassie – Meet Mrs B. (@MeetMrsBTweets)

Image credits: girl by Samantha Hahn, ballerina tea via Sophisticated Creation

Happy Saturday, folks!  This post was originally titled ‘That time I washed my hair with puppy shampoo and liked it’ but someone downstairs started practicing the theme to Star Wars on their picolo, so as you can imagine I got a little distracted by how Fifty Shades of Nerd that is and ended up meandering into other lanes of mind traffic.  At first I thought they were playing the intro to one of those news magazine shows, but then when I *quite literally* wrote it down like this in google search:

“da da da daaaaaa, da. da da da daaaaaa, da. da da da da-da-da-daaaaa… da dadaaaaa.”

… that’s when the Star Wars thing hit me.  It was interesting to use google to search for the answer to a question, since 99% of the time I’m just using it to make sure I spelled a word right.

PART I – I’m Outraged About a New Diet Drug + Everybody SHUT UP ALREADY about the TIME Magazine cover

Have you heard about the new diet drug being recommended by an FDA panel that in trial studies resulted in *a lot of* breast cancer in rats?  Well the doctor who leads the FDA panel says  ”rats are more likely to get these types of cancers than humans are anyway” SO YEAH DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT.  Much ado about nothing.

Clearly I do not care for this FDA panel guy.  In this situation the worst case scenario is that people are going to take this drug and totally get breast cancer from it like the rats, and the best case scenario is that we’re giving rats breast cancer because we are a nation enamored with buying dangerous pills to solve problems in spite of ourselves.  I’m sorry, rats.  I want to see you dead, but not this way.

In the other news from this week, how crazy was that TIME Magazine cover on attachment parenting and breastfeeding your toddlers?  If you answered, “not crazy at all, just a smart move by TIME Magazine to create a controversy that it knew would get people riled up and create a stir to make the whole nation start talking about the cover of TIME Magazine,” you would be right.

Mothers should feel free to choose and run with whatever parenting that they believe in.  I fully believe that persecuting moms about how long or how little they breastfeed their children, or whether they choose to work or stay home, or WHATEVER… I fully believe that we have to stop telling mothers that there’s One Best Way to parent, and that if you’re not doing it THAT way, you’re doing it wrong.  Such bullshit.

The article espouses the attachment parenting method, and encourages mothers to quit their jobs if they have one and commit fully to their children.  And you might expect me to go ballistic about this, but that’s hardly my response.  My response is: if you can afford that lifestyle, and that’s what you want to do in the raising of your children, that is totally awesome.  Do it.  No one should tell you otherwise.  BUT that also means that you can’t tell other mothers that it’s the be all/end all of mothering styles.  Because come on.  The majority of us can’t afford to quit our jobs and have our child turn into a living, breathing succubus for their own good later in life.

I just wish groups of people would stop asserting that *their way* is the best way to raise children.  Because there are lots of effective ways to raise a child.  Take my Mom, for example.  She worked when my little brother and I were on the younger side.  No attachment parenting there.  So how did I turn out?  Well, let me give you a short list.

The most memorable things about my childhood:

1) My Mom’s (and Dad’s) unconditional love for me and my little brother.

2) Watching movies together, and taking trips to the park together.  Because we did those things as a family, we shared the experience and it therefore became memorable.  Those simple times we had felt like the best times, no matter what we were doing.

3) That time I hijacked my toddler brother’s baby-walker and decided to fly down the basement steps to say hello to the wall with my face.  Both my parents were doing the laundry and so they got a front row seat to the show.  You’re welcome for that memory, Mom and Dad!

4) Like I mentioned, my Mom worked at times when my little brother and I were very young.  Something which that attachment parenting method poo-poos.  But here’s what I remember about my Mom having a job: she would sometimes bring little gifts home from the store if she got home late, and leave it by our beds, so that when we woke up in the morning we’d find a tiny gift that we always knew was from mom.  Superficially speaking, the gifts weren’t pricey or anything truly special.  But their value to us?  Totally priceless, to the two little babies who woke up and found a tiny present from our momma in the morning.

Those little gifts were some of my favorite gifts of my entire life, Mom.  Thanks for those memories.  It’s something I know will be fun to do with my own behbehkins if I ever decide to give you the pleasure of having grandchildren which I am at present undecided about so keep up the good behavior and we’ll see.

… My point with this list is, my Mom didn’t need to subscribe to any one parenting method or fad, to get me to feel that my childhood was fulfilling.  My memories are about the moments.

PART II – The Best Advice I Ever Got from My Mom On Relationships and Love

The following tips, lessons and general words of wisdom have been served to me throughout my life by my mother.  Whether by example, in times of consoling after a break-up, or while watching a Felicity back in the day and gabbing during commercials — the one thing all these lessons have in common is that they’re the ones I’ll be passing down to my daughter, should I be so lucky to have one.

5) Relationships, both of the Friend and the Lover sort, take work to thrive.  And when there is a foundation of real love and respect there, the growing pains will not stand a chance at breaking you.

4) Be honest in your disagreements, and if you argue at times, speak your feelings as well as listen attentively to your partner’s.  When neither of you are focused on your pride or *winning* the argument, it’s the relationship that wins because growth and understanding is your endgame.

3) Be affectionate.  Touch.  Kiss.  Hug.  Never stop being intimate.

2) You have to know yourself, and what you want out of life, to be able to know and love a partner.  This is the way to living a fuller life, being capable of independence, and being able to appreciate your partner for who they are, instead of finding your meaning in the relationship you have with that person.

1) Laugh together.

PART III – Last-Minute Gift Ideas That Will Make Your Mom Smile Ear to Ear

Idea 1) Get your Mom the book Fifty Shades of Grey and then just sit back on the couch and enjoy the awkwardness.

Idea 2) Buy her a lovely journal.  Before you present it, flip to the last page and write her a love letter if you’re her sweetheart, or a letter of love if you’re her offspring.  (Do not mix these two up.)

Idea 3) If you live relatively close to one another, pick her up and take her out to brunch and proceed to dish about your lives.  Moms LOVE this.

Idea 4) Not interested in spending that kind of money, you cheapskate?  Or maybe you want to make it a meal, but you want the experience to be/appear more thoughtful?  Guess what’s the best gift in the universe then, besides taking her OUT for food?  Buying fixins on the way to her place and cooking her a meal!  Because who doesn’t love a homecooked meal, AMIRITE?  Flip the script and let HER enjoy that feeling for once.

Idea 5) A French Bulldog.  Because if she doesn’t want it, you’ve got a new French Bulldog to take home.

Idea 6a) How ’bout an online gift card?  Because, this Mother’s Day, you want to be clear about the fact that you really don’t give a s**t about her.  And ‘online giftcard’ says that like nothing else can.

Idea 6b) Soften the blow of your total insensitivity by sending her one of these ecards from someecards.com.  My favorites for all types of situations are linked below.

^ my Mom’s getting this one at 9am tomorrow.

Idea 7) A Kindle.

Idea 8) Not edible arrangements.  She’s not your secretary.

(For the record, when I was a secretary I didn’t like them either.  But that–it could be just me.  I could be the only one who doesn’t like ingesting already cut up fruit offered to me by people in the workplace.)

Idea 9) If you and your momma can’t be together on this day, and you want to do something special to make this holiday stand out to her, give her a call and actually chat for a good half hour to an hour about real things.  You can both totally drink a glass of wine to make it go down easier if you’d like.  If your mom’s “a talker,” feel free to pre-game the call with a stronger cocktail that you don’t tell her about.  Then just watch the conversation fly by.  You might even enjoy it!  No promises.

Idea 10) If you’re just not that into your mom, and not even pre-gaming a phone call can make the conversation tolerable, take that lady to the movies and let other people do the talking.  It still qualifies as *spending time together* does it not?

Idea 11) If your mom’s anything like my mom, she doesn’t spend NEARLY enough time pampering herself, and instead focuses on work and loving all of us.  But don’t ye be fooled; she LOVES getting a manicure, just doesn’t ever carve out the time to do it.  So take her to get her nails done!  I highly recommend adding in a pedicure, so you both can just sit back and enjoy some dopamine-fueled chitchat while your legs and toes are getting massaged!**

**WARNING: Be sure not to discuss excerpts from your earlier gift of Fifty Shades of Grey.  This will help you both to avoid experiencing simultaneous involuntary orgasms in your massage chairs.  I am shivering with grossed-outedness from having just written that sentence.

Idea 12) Buy her an iPad.  No seriously.  If you’re looking for a great gift and you’re looking to spend a pretty penny on it, get her that iPad.  It’s my Mom’s dream gift, I know it, but she refuses to have me buy it for her.  She’s all “absolutely NOT.  You’re a young couple just starting out, you need that money for down payments and the rent and stuff.  Don’t you DARE buy me an iPad.”

Hey, you don’t need to go twisting my arm, aright?  I’ll get you an iPad, Mom.

Idea 13) Can you suggest another idea to fill in Number 13?  I can’t think of any more than those on this list but I don’t feel good about the list being at 13.  Very unlucky feeling.

Idea 14) Committed to getting her a legit gift, but just REALLY don’t have the time before Sunday to pick it up?  (Seriously?  It’s Saturday; stores are open right now– seriously, you can’t?)  Aright then no problem; here’s the solution: take your mom shopping for her gift.  This is two gifts in one; a gift she actually wants AND quality time with her whittle behbeh!

That last one’s what we call a win-win.

Tell me, do you know what you’re getting/doing for the mom in your life on Sunday?  I’d love to hear other ideas!  Sincere AND sarcastic. ;)

Happy Mother’s Day to the mommas out there!

xoxo  - Alison

Cover: Time Magazine

Oh, hey, happy late Thursday!  Just wondering… do you want to be the inspiration for a wedding app that’s literally named after you?  Not just abstractly based on your style; I’m talking NAMED. AFTER. YOU.  … you’re listening?  Cool.

Do you wanna win it by looking for pretty stuff on Pinterest (or creating an inspiration board without it, totes your call)?  I’m 99% sure you said yes.

Great.  LET’S DO IT. 

Now, I do hope you’re in the mood for another killer giveaway from Appy Couple AND a story, and not in that order, because here’s what happened to Alison at the market today.  {Fun Tip: even though there’s no rush, if you want me to shut up and just get started with giveaway, skip down to the next section, aptly titled “Giveaway Time!”}

I call this, “SuperMoon.”

I went to my local food shop earlier today and picked out a couple of things.  When I went up to pay, the young lady at the register and I started chatting, which we do every time, naturally.  She asked me if I’d like to sample a chocolate brownie and pointed to the cup sitting atop the counter.  I responded, “ahh, no hehe thanks.  I can’t do chocolate this early in the morning.”  <== weird thing to say for more than just the reason I did today.

She looked at me funny.  Then said:

“Oh.  Well, you know it’s the afternoon, right?”

I guess I didn’t know that.  HOW DID I NOT KNOW THAT.

I said… “oh, ‘course, yep.  thanks though,” with a smile.  And I grabbed the few items I’d just purchased in the time it had taken me to go from a nice girl who shops the store to the total weirdo who can’t tell her mornings from her afternoons.  That’s a characteristic shared with meth addicts you know.

But wait there’s more.  So you know how I grabbed those items?  I did it with my bare hands.  Meaning I didn’t wait for her to hand me the receipt, or hand me a pen for my signature, OR bag the groceries.  Instead I scooped them off the counter seconds after I handed her my credit card.  NOT WEIRD AT ALL.

She goes: “… Do you need a bag for those?”

Now this is one of those times in life, when you’ve got a choice to make: you can either come clean about the fact that you’re clearly insane today, or you can act like you totally meant to do that.

Inside: “YES PLEASE.”  Spoken words: “Oh, no I’m good.”

For some reason my instinct is to fake having meant to grab all of my groceries up into my bosom, instead of just to admit that this is as crazy as it looks and that yes I need that bag please hand it over.

Wanting to prove I’m not actually this crazy normally, I added more conversation.  Usually a bad idea, but when a sane person is feeling like she’s coming off a little crazy, the only thing that makes any sense is to say more words to prove she’s not.

“Do you hear that jack hammering going on all day?” I said.

“Uhh I don’t, no!?  Is there jack hammering?!”

Yeah!  It’s so crazy.  It’ll drive you crazy!”

… Clearly.

And that wraps up Installment # 2 of an unknown-number-of-parts series called, MONTHS-LONG CONSTRUCTION & YOU: “When the Jack Hammering Outside Your Window Stops Being Just Sound & Starts to Impact Your Behavior and Core Beliefs.”

Or maybe it’s just a latent impact of the Supermoon?  Nah it’s the jack hammering.  I am going loco.

What’s that?  Oh, you want me to STFU and stop it with these idiot stories and just tell you about the giveaway already?  Oh, ok sure.  I’m sorry.  I’m sorry about that.

Ok, SO!  The Appy Couple post and free invitation code we brought to you last week turned out to go pretty well, since we completely ran out, you guys swiped ‘em up so fast!  Atta peeps!  Soooo, what does this mean?

Another giveaway!  DOY.  Appy Couple is doing another killer giveaway with us, and clearly the supermoon has had an effect on THEM, but in a crazy good way, because they are kind of doing THE COOLEST + MOST CREATIVE THING EVER:

They’re asking you to INSPIRE YOUR OWN PERSONALIZED DESIGN and then GET THAT S**T NAMED AFTER YOU, YA HEARD?!!

What You Have to Do:

1) Let us know in a comment below that you think you wanna enter this giveaway (duh)

2) All that’s left to do is create your inspiration board!  Aka have a lot of fun. :)  How to do it: I recommend going to Pinterest, being sure to follow The Knotty Bride where we hang out on Pinterest, and THEN going forth and gathering up all the inspiration you can find that just screams YOU, and putting all of it onto a pinboard!  Well I mean not literally; don’t fill up the pinboard with different ways to scream the word “you.”  Duh.  Wait why am I even explaining this to you like you’re a bunch of toddlers.  Obviously you get it.

Where to Send Your Pinterest Pinboard or Inspiration Board: Send the link to your Pinterest board (or send your inspiration board image made using something other than Pinterest) to –>  founders@appycouple.com, and then three will be chosen.  The three (3) most interesting and inventive will receive their own Appy Couple App design, named after them, and added to the design catalog!  HUGE!  So seriously, get excited, because THAT’S awesome.  Oh, and of course, if you’re one of the three winning submissions, you’ll get Appy Couple for FREE. :)

YEAH BOYYEEE.  So good.

…… did you hear me, I said naaaaaamed after you!!!!!  I’m sorry, I just can’t get over this.  These are the things that excite me in this world.

Deadline: Send links or images before May 15 to: founders@appycouple.com

^ keep that deadline in mind, y’all!

Ok, have fun creating/submitting your perfect pin board!

And hope you didn’t totally effing hate my ridiculous story.  Because WTF, me.

xoxo!  - Alison

P.S. – I took this screen shot of TKB’s account on Pinterest to use in the lead image, and then I was about to put it into this post in full when I realized the word “whore” was right smack in the middle.  Not planned.  Including it anyway.

Best of luck winning, my friendlies!