THIS or THAT? | My Room Appears to Be Haunted… Woot? PLUS: An App I’m Loving, Our New Fave Show, AND: Are You a “Balanced” Couple? | Cameron Leung Photography

Happy evening, you guys.  ’sup.

{Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

TOP 10 EMBARRASSING THINGS ABOUT ME | The Holidays Are Here! Studies Show Couples Fight Approximately a Shit Ton During This Time. Let Me Distract You From It.

Yeah so I just thought I’d start off this post with some cheery pictures a la up top from the last few days, since we’re about to get into some heavy shit here.   {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

GIRL TALK: The Single Most Essential Behavior to a Lasting Relationship. Do You Do It? PLUS: A DIY Rustic Vintage Teacup Wedding by Honey Honey, & LOL News Fit to Blog.

OMFGYOUGUYSTHISWEDDING.  <== no seriously this time.

But first, I have a little story for you {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

HEY GIRL: Are We Over Ryan Gosling Yet? Let’s Test It By Pouring Over This Shoot Inspired By “The Notebook”

Just FYI-

If saving the world ends up being about me having to print out a document using my personal at-home printer, without assistance from others or an unlimited supply of printer paper on which to inexplicably mess up,

apologies ahead of time for your death.

{Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

GIRL TALK | Open Marriage: Good Idea or Bad Idea? PLUS: A Rustic Outdoor Wedding, & Way Too Many Puppy Pics.

So I turned on the television yesterday, and that Survivor host guy Jeff Probst’s new talk show came on, because talk shows are the new book deal and book deals are the new fake tan (everybody’s got one).  They were coming up on a segment about “open marriage.”

I like to call this segment, SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH.     {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

DEAR TKB: “I fell in love with a less than traditional gown…” PLUS: Would You Wear One of These Dresses On Your Wedding Day?

Happy Friday, hunnies!

I have to be honest with you; I am at a complete loss for how to start off this post because I’m sitting here waiting to leave for his and hers dermatologist appointments and I’m very on edge.  We’re going together because I have this secret {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

RUSTIC GOLDEN DIY | Once You See This Stylish New Seating Chart Idea, You’re Gonna Want It At Your Party.

So like, you are totally voting today, right?

Won’t be bugging you about it, just want to say this one thing: even if your voting lines are crazy long, DO NOT HESITATE to stay in line for your turn.  Your employer is required to forgive your absence.  <== yayYUH!

Alrighty.  Great news, you guys– {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

TODAY IN ‘ZOMG’ | Romantic Gothic Wilderness Wedding Inspiration, French Bulldogs, Writer’s Block and My Boobs. | Feat. Izzy Hudgins & French Knot Studios

Happy late Friday evening.  I = back.

“NO, momma– I wanna dress like a *whore* version of Snow White”  - being uttered by children coming of age in modern-day American society during the month of October.

Think about it.  But not for too long because ew, weird.

 

So uh, those sentences above? = how my Halloween post started out originally, when it was scheduled to go up before Halloween.  Silliness and inappropriateness.  NBD, right?  And then this happened:   {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

Hurricane Update…

Thank you to everyone who has been asking about our status.  We are ok, and deeply appreciate your concern.  Currently we know of extensive damage to homes of friends and relatives in the greater NY area, HOWEVER everyone is alive.  Crazy writing a sentence like that.

If you find that you’d like to help, you can do so by donating to the Red Cross.

Thank you, much love to all of you.  Hope all of you are safe and sound today.

xoxo  - Alison

Love all of this...

What Barely-Clothed Version of a Celebrity Will You Be Dressing As This Halloween? Plus: OMG,You Guys. There Are Halloween-Inspired Shoots That Don’t Suck!

Good evening, friends!  Happy almost Halloween!  Though not so happy for me.  *cue the violins*

You know this already, but {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

8 Secrets for a Honeymoon That’ll Leave You Both *Satisfied* (… ifyouknowwhatimean) | Honeymoon Pixie

Hello, lovers.  Today’s first post coming atcha faces.

Andrew Marino is dropping by today with some tips to ensure a super awesome sexy cuddly exciting honeymoon for you and your honeybunny with maximum sexual readiness and limited frustrations.  Well… he didn’t say any of that stuff specifically, but that’s what these tips will get you if you follow them correctly.  (Trust me.)

And who doesn’t want to have super awesome sexy cuddly exciting times on their honeymoon?  No seriously I’m asking.  I’m willing to make house visits to figure out what the hell is wrong with you if that is not your precise honeymoon objective.  For me, a honeymoon is about three things; relaxation, fun, and banging.  And not in that order.  So if you and I are on the same page… let me take you, now, to the tips…   {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

BRIDAL FASHION WEEK | Top Choice in: *Trends* | The One Trend I Wanted in Dresses, Happened!!! Plus Bambino.

So friends… it came, and it went.  And it was spectacular.  Bridal designers converged on NYC earlier this month for Bridal Fashion Week, and on the whole they brought forth perhaps the most satisfying alternative ever, to the full pelvic lower back tattoo of a mason jar holding a lavender bouquet shaped like a giant mustache sipping on a striped paper straw that I was going to get in order to make my wedding photos that super extra special bit of unique.  “Blog-worthy,” as they say.

Mom, you can start speaking to me again!  Not getting the back tattoo you said you’d kill yourself over before you lived another day to see me with a back tattoo!

Just kidding about the tattoo.  I’m not an idiot.  My tattoo will be {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

ON KIDS AT WEDDINGS: I Went to a Wedding That Got Ruined by a Baby. Plus: DIY Monogram Secret Message Puzzle by Renee!

Happy Monday, lovers.  Today I have a story I’ve been meaning to share with you.   {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

OF DRESSES AND FACIALS | Bridal Fashion Week: World’s Most Shocking Frock + Would You Wear a Mullet Dress?

Happiest of evenings to you, peeps.

Bambino pic right off the bat, because I listen to my readers.  And apparently most of you prefer my frenchie to me.  So, yay.   {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

GIRL TALK | The #1 Pair of Underwear for Girls’ Butts Is… & Coolest Photo Shoot Prop of the Month, by Anna Pociask

me again.  happy Friday afternoon and hope you’re ready for a .gif parade…

Below is what Bambino was doing at the foot of our bed last night.  The baby tiger on the left is our expression while this was going on for seven straight hours.

{Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

SUCCULENT DIY + MR ROGERS | Modern Golden Succulent Vases by Renee + My Shameful Sunday Night.

You guys, I watched the Real Housewives of New Jersey finale Sunday night and OMG, I cannot.  OMFG what was that.  Did you watch it (admit it so we can talk!)?  I didn’t know if I was supposed to be judging a pageant or jerking off to some new type of highly satisfying porn.  Is Women Annoyingly Yelling a genre of pornography?  If it isn’t then I have NFI what I ate my dinner to between 10 and 11pm.  I really think it was pornography because I was super into it while I was watching it but now that it’s over I feel ashamed/like I want to take it all back.  I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry.

Let’s shift gears and leave that back there, never to speak of it again as long as we live.  The following video went viral recently and if my heart were a caterpillar, this video reached inside of my chest tore out my still-beating heart and allowed it to blossom into a highly emotional butterfly, killing me.  So now my heart is a butterfly with PMS, WATCH OUT.   {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

DEAR TKB: “So, I’m a little scared of marriage right now…” + A BRIDE & HER CAKE | Kristi Wright Photography

These question and answer posts are steadily becoming my favorite types of posts.  You guys submit some really intense (AND CHALLENGING FOR ME) questions.  Crossing my fingers every time I answer one of these things, since you just really never know.    {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

The Knotty Bride is Hiring, Bitchez! Also: My Top 10 Favorite Baby Animal Boops, Because Why Not.

>> This position has been filled; thank you to all those who applied! <<

I’m not literally *hiring bitches*, I’m… whatevs, you understand.  ANYWHO, SO…

I’m trying to cut back on my use of exclamation points (current use level: through the roof).  Let’s see how far I can make it.

Happy afternoon/evening, friendlies! DAMNIT.  Anyway you may have noticed that I’ve not been your typical Alison lately.  Meaning, I haven’t been tweeting sunrise to sunset and my blogging pace has gone from a deliberate gallop, to that thing at track meets where you walk really fast and then somehow medal, despite having just walked in a race.  What is that called- ‘fastwalking?’  Racewalking?*  Who cares- the good news is I finally get to explain to you what is really going on.

{*please, no racewalking letters.}

See that lower left image up there, with the beams – {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

GIRL TALK + WINNERS | Appy Couple Custom Designs + Princess Kate’s Royal TenenBoobs and Me: My (Embarrassing) Personal Story.

Happy late evening, bubbuhbears!  I just called you guys what we call Bambino, AWWWWWW.  I think that means I love you.

{Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

Not Gonna Talk About Kate Middleton’s Boobies. PLUS: TKB News, a Pink + Red + White Wedding by Nessa K, The Best Advice I Ever Got… and life these days.

I know I wrote a lot of words today.  I just feel like I have to say it all.

The way that I’m gonna start this off is by first telling you the way that I am not gonna start it off.  Which is: talking about Kate Middleton’s boobies.  You really think I’m gonna throw that kinda thing in your face on a MONDAY AFTERNOON?  Please- I am not that crass.  I do not hurl nakedness at you on just any day of the week.  I hurl sex stuff at you only on Tuesday through Friday and sometimes Saturday.  Which means I’m waiting until tomorrow to talk about Kate Middleton’s chest being photographed/published/seen by the world entirely without her permission.

{Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

DIY + PERSONAL | Metallic Tassel Party Envelopes By Renee, My Life In Instagram Pics, My New Favorite Jacket, + a Note On Bleeding Every Month.

Addendum: 

We have a gas leak in the area.  Con Ed has been jackhammering day and night, literally 24 hours a day.  The smell is so strong we’ve had to keep our windows shut since last night, and there is visible gas all over the street.  The paramedic who parks his ambulance under our window every day is currently enjoying a cigarette a few yards from the drill site.  

So if you don’t hear from me, you’ll know what happened. UPDATE: We iz alive! :)

Resume regularly scheduled talking:

Happy Friday, faces!

The other day I told Honey it was time for me to write a really straightforward, grossly honest post here on the blog, listing out every single mother effing thing that makes Shark Week (<–menstruation, if you’re new here) kind of a drag.

He said, “Ok, cool.  Just let me know the publish date so that I can be sure to AVOID IT LIKE THE PLAGUE.”

It isn’t today, Honey.  Full post is scheduled for next week.  Everyone else…. girrrrd yourrrr loiiinnnnnns.  Oo and if you have any of your own that you’d like me to include in the list, feel free to share them below.  And indicate if you want it to be anonymous, be offering it anonymously. :) {Continue reading…}

Love all of this...

WIN: One Stellar Wedding Photography Package, from Ivan Apfel Photography {Contests, Giveaways & LOL Cats}

I’m gearing up to publish some pretty personal posts here on the blog.  Because why not, right?  Omg, that’s probably the worst reason to do it.

Anyway the awkward thing about personal posts is that they can get a little emotiontacular, whether or not it’s my intention (usually my intention).  Mostly because everybody’s a lot more similar than we are different, and so ya’always run the chance of deeply identifying with me and all of my s**t that I go through.  And that s**t can be heavy.  I’m gonna stop calling it my s**t.

So I’ve been trying to think of what would be the best way to pregame those posts for you.  And I came up with this: telling you about the super amazing contest/giveaway Ivan Apfel is holding!  Because DUH.  Of course that’s a good idea.  I keep trying to tell you; this wedding blogging thing?  It ain’t rocket science.  And I don’t care what you might have believed, skin-grafting and cadaver dissections make up only a small part of what goes on here, in the wedding blogging world.  50 hours max, of dissecting human cadavers.  It almost NEVER happens!!  Where was I.  Oh right…

When I think about Ivan Apfel‘s work, I get excited.  I just love a photographer who has what you gotta believe is the winning combination in this field: amazing at/in love with what he does for a living, AND just generally a cool dude.  Like, if you’re the one who wins his contest, and you guys are meeting for the first time and you go to shake his hand, it will resemble a scene like this:

So gentle.  Even if you generally act like this:

Though I definitely don’t condone/think you should be acting like that.  I’m just saying he is a classy guy.  And that kind of thing really makes a difference when it comes to the way you experience your wedding day.  So that’s why, when he let me know he was running a new contest, I started throwing up rainbows again.

AH, I know.  I really need to get this checked, but the leading specialist in gastrorainbowology here in nyc is booked through December.  I’ll let you know how it goes.  Just- expect more rainbow outta my face, until then.

So anyway… wanna win a contest?  If so, then today’s a good day for you, cuz this one’s happening.  For more details and to enter, go visit the contest page of Ivan’s site!  And best of luck, lovelies!  I just know you’ll be so happy if you win. :)

xoxo  - Alison

P.S. – sorry for the WEIRDEST POST EVER WRITTEN.  I think I need to do yoga or something.

Ivan Apfel Photography is a member of Vendor Love.  Explore more of his work here, in TKB’s vendor guide.

credits: images in envelope at top: Ivan Apfel Photography / cat lolz: icanhascheezburger.com

Love all of this...