Alison here… with the first order of business: it’s Tuesday night, and yep that’s right, YOU’RE BACHELOR RECAP IS IN PROGRESS. OH ALSO, DID I JUST WRITE *YOU’RE* IN THAT SENTENCE BACK THERE WHERE I TALKED ABOUT YOUR BACHELOR RECAP? Because I could swear I’m smarter than that.
What in the F Word is happening to me.
I have a mind to think it’s this whole Chrisharrison situation that just happened to my face. Chrisharrison had to pull me aside earlier to tell me some story that I was totally thinking was about my best friend dying or my dog dying or the apocalypse or that I’m pregnant with the child of Satan or that I have to marry Ben, because of the awkward way he made THE MOST MAGNIFICENT OF DEALS ABOUT IT when he came to grab me. But it turns out he just had to tell me about some really awesome, awesome guy from my past who really loves to eff up my future, and how I now have to go home for no good reason, and then my face started crying for like, I think it was at least four commercial breaks. It was rough. But I’m sure Chrisharrison totally didn’t sum up my abrupt departure to my family and friends by saying “Alison had to go home because she was here for the wrong reasons,” or anything like that, I’m sure of it. I trust Chrisharrison and his unwavering dedication to truth-telling.
NEW TOPIC, IT START NOW!
SORRY, ME LOW ON WELL-CRAFTED TRANSITIONS AT MOMENT; ALL RESOURCES ARE BELONG TO RECAP
We introduced a fun, upbeat, super-lighthearted new series recently, on the topic of totally awful, horrible in-law situations that completely sucked/were hard. And given the way our last real life story went over with y’all, I’m psickity-psyched to bring you yet another harrowing tale of what happens when families that are not equally prepared to merge… like totally MERGE anyway.