The Knotty Bride™ Wedding Blog + Wedding Vendor Guide

Debating whether to start recapping The Bachelor again.  For old time’s sake.  Lemme know if you want it.

RECAP UPDATE: On a scale of 1 to 10 it’s killing me.  But I’m almost done!  As always I thank you for your patience while I poop the thing out.  

BUT FIRST-

I have to talk about Ryan Gosling’s hair for a minute.

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… ski bunny that is!  guys? guys where’d you go…

I feel like before you read this I should warn you that things got a little out of hand in this post.  I do that sometimes- please just go with it.

To start: my jeans appear to be cutting off blood flow to my feet today, so – I think I’ve got this *girl* thing down.   {Continue reading…}

Hey guys!  Happy Thursday afternoon to your entire collective face.  Ok so in this post we’ve got three things:

• a boudoir shoot
• tips for rocking it right
• my puppy, Bambino Wigglestein McPuppypants, III, Esquire

I included my puppy because you guys like me to include pictures of my puppy, but also because: {Continue reading…}

Are you sitting down?

Ok.  I’m going to trust that you’re sitting down– because why would you lie to me, right?  We go so far back.  No BUT SERIOUSLY, I wouldn’t want to start this blog post, and have you all still standing up or something.  It’s just that I’m worried I’d be liable for some of kind of mass-faint reaction.  And then all the firemen in the nation would be tied up investigating this completely baffling national faint I caused, and they wouldn’t be around to put out any actual fires.

Well actually… that’s wrong. {Continue reading…}

Hey peeps!  Ok, before I jump into this first post of two today, I’m gonna show you some evidence supporting the argument that I’m evil.  And I ask you to be honest with me – is this evil?  Or is this a totally legitimate response…   {Continue reading…}

My friends, my buddies, my pals.  Today is a special day here in Knottyland.  For, today, I get to introduce you to our very first Bloggista.  Whaaaaaaaat????  I KNOW. I’m trembling with delight and anticipation and also because this building shakes all day and I’m just generally trembling.  But I assure you it is PRONOUNCED.  Because holy heck, there is reason to be excited.  {Continue reading…}

*faints*

Happy Friday afternoon… err evening, darlings!!!  So ummmm… this post?  Number one, I couldn’t be happier that this is how we’re going into the weekend.  But I must warn you, it got *very out of hand* around the beginning area (like right now, here) and then it started to pick up speed like so many cartoon snowballs and I’m sort of warning you of this fact before you grab your late afternoon latte and jump in head first.  Helmets save lives.

Oh wait, how gauche of me – {Continue reading…}

Because I like to consider TKB an institution on par with such esteemed news reporting outlets as the Nightly News with Brian Williams, The New York Times and of course Fox News, I would, in kind, like to note an error in yesterday’s broadcast (translation: blog post; just broadcast sounds cooler):

Yesterday, I quoted Bentley as saying “tickle my b***hole” when listing all the wonderful things that Ashley could do for him on The Bachelorette, and we all had a laugh at his expense.  But, ladies and gentlemen, that statement was incorrect, and I apologize to Bentley for misquoting his words.  To make the mistake of putting “b***hole” in Bentley’s mouth when it was indeed something entirely different that came out of his mouth, well that’s almost inexcusable.  So, {Continue reading…}

I sat through the invasive surgery that was the season premiere of The Bachelorette last night. {Continue reading…}

Happy Monday, friendlies!  Hope you had a nice weekend!  Aright enough niceties…

First off – sigh, I know, “Kim Kardashian, Alison?  Really?”  I know, I know.  I get it.  Someone who’s career launched out of a sex video, and who keeps that career going by knowingly exploiting that very thing that made her famous but who complains publicly every time a magazine shows a little nip *is not* someone to be admired here on TKB.  Totes with you on that.  But here’s the thing: {Continue reading…}

Happy Monday, lovelies!  How’s everybody doing this fine morning?  I hope you’re all doing better than {Continue reading…}

Ok, about The Bachelor.

Brad Womack said this to Emily last night while her mini-me slept upstairs, during another sleepy installment in what has been a string of boring episodes.

“I guess I’m just a weird guy.”

Nailed it, idiot. {Continue reading…}

Happy Friday, my loves!  I’m over the moon this morning because the treats I have for you today are nothing short of spectacular.  Not to mention, they force an issue I believe needs to be addressed.  {Continue reading…}

So.  Rihanna’s got a new single.  It’s called “S&M.”  I feel like I should be shocked by this title but really, at this point when it comes to Rihanna, I’m sort of used to the blatant sexuality of her every move.  But the video.  The video shocks me a bit.  Not a video to be watched at work, which is why I’m not placing it in this post.  I just did you a solid.  :)

And I swear at one point she’s dressed as a condom.  {Continue reading…}

SO!

Boudoir is a hot topic, obvs.  We receive lots of questions from you guys about it, so now’s as good a time as any to devote a post to the topic and, hopefully, help you guys become a bit more comfortable with the concept.

{Continue reading…}

As promised, today I get to bring the dark side of this shoot to your faces.  Star Wars of course has nothing to do with it {Continue reading…}

Ok, first things first… the big announcement cometh: Vendor Love, The Knotty Bride’s Preferred Vendor Guide,  launches {Continue reading…}

I have a little treat for you today.  And I pretty much guarantee you wouldn’t have thought about doing something like this on your own.  {Continue reading…}

↑ Yeah.  I KNOW. ↑ {Continue reading…}

SO!

As you pretties know, this here wedding blog is called “The Knotty Bride.”  And though most of you know why that is, I’d like to take a moment to edify any newbies to the scene.  {Continue reading…}

I am not a fan of the summer we’re having, New York.  And the rest of the world, for that matter.  I want to state that for the record.  Not. A. Fan.  What is up, Summer?  Did you just get out of a bad break-up, and feel like punishing us for it?  And by the way, is your most beloved form of punishment awkwardly-located mosquito bites?  Because {Continue reading…}